Eighty Candles

I haven't written anything here mainly due to the fact that I self-edit as I write. I am, for whatever reason, far too critical of my thoughts being in written form. I tend to write and then rethink things and erase it all. I'm trying this new thing, just letting it flow and be what it is...we'll see how that pans out.

Today was my mother's 54th birthday. A lot of people her age dislike each birthday more and more as they age, often just another reminder of how old one is or feels. But my mother is different; she loves that she's another year older. It's inspiring to be around someone like that.

A little less than a month ago it was my birthday. This year I was in a funk about life. I remember telling a friend all I wanted for my birthday was for everyone to just go away. Not in the normal meaning of the phrase really, almost as though I was wishing for a strange deserted sort of alone. As though I could wake up one morning and leave the house and the city would be oddly empty, just for one day. Why did I want this? Who would wish to have a ghost town existence for one day? Even now thinking about it, it doesn't make sense to me now. The friend that I told this 'birthday wish' to took me to The Nelson, which is my usual form of peace and solace. So my hat's off to close friends that know what you want even when you are lost and unsure. :)