Hateful Organs

It's been almost three years since my stomach troubles started. It seems insane at times it's been that long and I'm still trying to figure out how to keep my organs in check. Most days are good the past couple months; part of me hates to rock the boat and try to make it any better and then I hate that I am happy to settle for OK when it's possible I could feel normal for the first time in years. I suppose I now know just how bad it can get though, and while "normal" seems like the unattainable dream for me I still wish it were possible. I have however, accepted many things after three years. Most of which I think will be better in the long term for me; like I no longer miss coffee or soda. I still miss caffeine on those early mornings immediately following those late nights, but in general I don't even want anything with caffeine now. I am also now drinking these protein shakes with every meal, for two reasons. Firstly it ensures I get some protein with every meal in the event I can't eat food and secondly it helps fill me up so I eat smaller meals which keeps my organs happier. I still have my off days, but I find solace in the fact that they aren't frequent. The hardest part is knowing I cant' fix it; not really. There is no pill or magic cure all way to make it disappear forever. Even now as I write this I am nauseous...my stomach hurts...but I also know enough now to know it will get better as the day goes on. I am often telling myself "this too shall pass"...I have survived with this nonsense for going on three years now, I can get through one more day.